Anita and I went out to the Trimble Campground Cumberland Presbyterian Church
a few nights ago during their annual revival. The speaker grew up in the Dolph area
but has resided in the Ouachita River bottoms of South Arkansas for several years.
I’ve known Garland for a long time. His dad and I served together on the school
board for a period of time. After we shook hands and exchanged a few pleasantries,
out of the blue Garland commented about how much he enjoyed my comments that
have been appearing every two weeks in the Current. He said he looked forward to
receiving the newspaper and that my ramblings were “like a breath of fresh air.”
WOW!! My hat size zoomed to XXL. Really, though, I appreciate the positive
responses that many of you directed to me. If my count is correct, this is the sixth
column I have attempted to write. Which means that is about five more that I
figured I would try. Remember, this is only my opinions that I am airing and I’m
sure they differ with many of yours. For instance, remember my column on “Dogs
I have known.” Ruffled few dog lovers. I like some dogs OK. I just don’t want
a dog. A friend told me that I should never keep eye contact with a pit bull. Makes
them aggressive. I guess I escaped that time. By the way, to balance out things, I
don’t want a cat either. Steve and Sandye have a worthless cat named “Cat.” Boy,
that took a lot of thinking, didn’t it? When I was a boy, we had several cats that
stayed at the barn. They earned their bed and board as they should. They were all
good “mousers.” My granddad left them a bowl of milk when he did the morning
and evening milking. Well, I might as well go all the way. I don’t want a horse,
either. Let me give you some advice. Never buy a horse from a horse trader. I
tried that once. My left shoulder is still sore from the last time that big black
animal bucked me off. He went to the sale barn in a hurry.
One more thing and I’ll get back to work. In a recent sermon, my pastor commented
on the writings of the Apostle Paul and that we should look for the word “therefore”
and pay attention to the thoughts that follow. I am also “wordy” and get off my subject
a lot of the time but look the word “anyway” which will get you back on track. Anyway,
I ran out of space before I got through with my remarks on “Words” the last time. I
recently received an e-mail entitled “English is a crazy language.” The writer commented
that a “slim chance” and a “fat chance” can be the same but a “wise man” and a “wise guy” are opposites. Also people “recite” at a play and “play” at a recital. Did you know
that you can make amends but can’t make one amend? Why are boxing rings “square?”
There were several other examples but I think you get the idea. I had heard before that
the English language was the most difficult to learn. There are too many words that
are spelled the same or sound the same, such as: It is FAIR to say that you may go to
the FAIR if you have a FAIR complexion and can pay the FARE. If you don’t FUDGE
you can have a piece of FUDGE. Let me give you a riddle: What word takes up almost
a half page of the dictionary and can be used as a noun, verb, adjective, adverb, preposition, both as a prefix or a suffix or slang? This word, amazingly, has only two
letters and when spelled it describes the activity you do at the end of the day before
retiring. Give up? Look it UP. (Was that groans I just heard?) Watch for Tom* in
the next issue of the Current. I’ll be back in two weeks. Until then, this is Reed, rambling along in the Queen City of the Ozarks, beautiful Calico Rock, AR. Bye!
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